There are some people who just seem to know how to live in harmony. They achieve this because they are well-balanced individuals but it’s also because they seem to understand people. More often than not, such people grew up in a stable family where adults and kids were encouraged to voice their feelings. It is highly likely they were allowed to express their opinions and their opinions were respected.

Growing up in an environment where you are free to be yourself but within the constraints of respecting others is an enormous advantage. Such individuals, who are exposed to many opinions and emotions, as well as the opinions and emotions of others, learn to know different personalities.

What is also very beneficial is they learn to react in an appropriate way to the feelings and opinions of others on a daily basis. Another very simple way to put it is, they understand human nature. Not only are they exposed to the best behavior in families but also the not so desirable behavior such as bad moods, selfish behavior, lazy behavior etc. What is important is they get to see how balanced adults and older kids react to such behavior.

Creating lasting harmony in a relationship does not mean you constantly have to agree with your partner. If you did, you would be nothing more than a ‘doormat’. It really doesn’t matter what kind of situation you and your partner find yourselves in. What is important to harmony is how you react to situations and each other.

If you didn’t have the benefit of growing up in a home with balanced individuals who interacted in a healthy manner – don’t beat yourself up. If you recognize you have weaknesses such as negative reactions then you have a very good chance of ‘reprogramming’ your behavior.

A very good rule is to communicate with your partner. In order to communicate effectively means you are completely honest about your feelings. If you misinterpret what your partner is saying or doing, ask him or her if you are getting the wrong picture. This is far better than causing an ugly scene because you misunderstand. If you communicate with your partner to understand words and actions, you will, over time, correctly read his or her intentions.

It is impossible to have harmony in a relationship without respect. Respect goes a lot further than ‘liking or admiring’ your partner. It could be said respect is for actions and behavior. If the actions and behavior of a person are right then that respect is carried through to the actual person. If you are always careful to ensure your actions and behavior fit the situation then you have a greater chance of harmony.

You will probably not achieve harmony in a relationship right away. It takes getting to know your partner and getting to know yourself in order to behave and think in a way that creates harmony.