4 Ways To Break The Ice When Relationship Problems Arise Post Marriage?
February 18, 2012 12:07
Every couple has to go through highs and lows when in a relationship. When you date someone and fall in love with them, you are so drenched in the beautiful feeling called ‘love’ that you tend to overlook any faults in your partner. Once you get married to this person and spend ample of time together, you begin to find plenty of faults in the same person. These noticeable differences then lead to arguments and an eventual silence finds a place between you and your partner. At such times, it becomes really difficult to break the ice and confront your partner and mend things. Hence, we’ve come up with some tips on how to break the ice when your relationship goes sour post marriage.
1. Communication
In most cases, people, just like you, have absolutely no problem communicating with their partner when they are going through the dating phase. It is because you had only pleasant things to say and hear from one another. Now, you have problems to solve and offenses to talk over. This means you need to learn a new way of communication. For that, you need to master the ‘I’ technique. Earlier in your relationships, you used to say much of ‘you’ things like “you are so great”, “you are lovely, “you are so smart”, etc. Post marriage, it changes to “you are dumb”, “you are lazy”, “you are late”, “you hurt me” and the likes. Now, you need to use better phrases like, “I feel hurt”, “I feel unhappy”, “I feel upset” and such similar things. This way, you’ll be able to exactly tell your partner what your thoughts are and perhaps you can find a solution together.
2. Time
When you get married and have kids, the time you spend together reduces a lot. You cannot be in a good and warm relationship with someone whom you barely see. Set aside some special time for your spouse. Be active and creative during this time. Enjoy it.
3. Money
It is another source of trouble in marriages. Financial issues are pretty sensitive. They can bring about many conflicts and arguments. Remember that money is authority. Work together on your budget. Define who is responsible for making/saving money, how the money should be spent and who will manage domestic accounts.
4. Love
Love was what brought you together. Keep it alive forever. If you were first willing to overlook certain faults in your man, continue to have the same approach. Forgive him. Be patient and also work on yourself. Have sex as many times as possible. It is one of the strongest glues that will keep the relationship going smooth. Do something new, surprise your man. This could surely help to break the ice. One last tip, if nothing of the aforesaid tips work, sex would surely do. After all, most men pine for physical pleasures more than anything else.